"Oh how you take delight in vexing me!!"

Greetings from our beloved Gordon on this warm and sunny Independence Day!

I miss you all as I imagine you gathering with family and friends to cookout out, watch fireworks, and/or run around with sparklers in the dark. While my family is far away, I do find myself surrounded by wonderful Gordon people and great friends. This morning I went for a swim in Gull with some fellow Adventure Camp staff, and picked some lettuce from the Gordon Garden for our cookout out in back of Conrad for dinner. It was a BEeaaaauutiful Day! A refuge day! :)

It's such a strange feeling being here on an empty campus. Yesterday evening I laid down in the middle of the quad with not a single person in sight. It's lonely, but peaceful at the same time. It makes me so grateful for everyone living here in Gedney! And they are a great bunch! This has definitely been a summer of learning: Tung So Do, Group power Yoga, Swing dancing, piano, kayaking, and mountain biking. I've been able to try and learn so many wonderful things, and meet so many incredible people. My roommate and I try to run to West beach a couple times a week and she tells me of her travels in Chili and Argentina.

While all of this has been truly wonderful, and God has definitely been blessing me abundantly, this last week was one of the most difficult and stressful weeks I can remember in a long while. My campers were.. something else. Granted, I am unused to the company of middle-schoolers, and it is easy to sit from a lofty seat and point fingers, but these kids were so mean, so selfish, sarcastic and soo oo frustrating. Not all the time. I am angry, but more so grieved. These kids are so sure of themselves, and yet so unsure of themselves. They believe so many lies, and refuse to believe the truth because of "some internet source." I think the worst part of it is that I feel as though I failed in many respects as their counselor. With these kids I felt totally out of control, as if there was nothing I could do. Instead, I watched one camper struggle with an eating disorder, others started "gossip group" at lunch, snickered at outsiders, and make up wild stories about my co-counselor being a drug addict. I felt as though I was already constantly correcting them, telling them why this and this was wrong, but it didn't seem to make much a difference. Okay, I don't mean to sound like such a downer. There were some beautiful, redeeming moments in the interactions of my group. And God was definitely there..though it didn't always feel like it.

I would really appreciate some prayer going into week two. The thing is, I don't even know what to pray for... everything?! That I would love God more and remember to call out on Him throughout the day. That I would be a better counselor. That I would love my campers. Thank you dear friends for reading and supporting me! It means so, so, so very much. MUCH LOVE.

Sincerely,
Sarah

P.S.
I have been trying to draw little pictures every day with little captions. I wanted to share a couple with you!